so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
Did you just see the Batmobile???
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
Randomize
