I scissor kicked a one legged man last night.
He was trying to put me in handcuffs.
You have my attention.
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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