Got a toothbrush?
I don't think brook has ever known best
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Randomize
