conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
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