Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
