I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize
