He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
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