Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
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