There was a lot of him and a little penis
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
Randomize
