oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
I slept in bed with them the night they met. I once peed on the bride. And now I get to give a speech at their wedding. Piece of cake.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
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