woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
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