butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
I woke up this morning with "guy in polar bear j.crew boxers" written on my stomach along with a 5 digit phone number...
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
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