Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
Randomize
