YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
Randomize