wake up i wanna do it froggy style
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
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