The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
The real estate's complaint had the words "loud squealing at 2am" in it. Then I remembered that was me spoon feeding you guys old potato salad while you screeched like baby birds. Great night.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
Randomize