I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
We found you passed out clutching your purse. There was 16oz of unopened cheddar cheese inside. You just kept saying SALSA YES.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
Randomize
