yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
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