Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
Pissed on my Blackberry at the Astros game. Wish me luck explaining that one at work.
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
