apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
apparently i ate an entire bag of goldfish, kissed some guy with a girlfriend who now wants to kill me, made my sister sleep in my bed with me while i wore no pants, and told my whole family i am pregnant with jonny's devil baby...never drinking again
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
Randomize
