physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
my new years resolutions dont apply when im drunk
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
Randomize
