We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Randomize
