I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
