Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
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