it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
One girl and one boy is just not enough.
things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
Randomize
