Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(803): View more from South Carolina

im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk

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(425): View more from Washington

This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.

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(214): View more from Texas

Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,

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(650): View more from California

We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.

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(250): View more from British Columbia

They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am

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(352): View more from Florida

Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.

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(303): View more from Colorado

Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?

(509): View more from Washington

You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.

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(732): View more from New Jersey

He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.

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(816): View more from Missouri

She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors

(660): View more from Missouri

You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?

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