Midget sex pt 2 tonight
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
She's the barista slut.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
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