She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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