I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
You know you're getting old when 19 year olds you've met on tinder advise you that you should start looking for a wife and/or the mother of your children
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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