Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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