its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
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