just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
I'm going to start referring to my liver is Livy. I feel like if I give it an affectionate nickname it will hate me less. Livy isn't ready for syllabus week.
I think we all know your liver needs a man's name.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
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