seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
Woman walking into toby keith concert: 8 months pregnant, black eye, shirt on that has a picture of a boot and the words "we'll put a boot up your ass" with an american flag printed over--the sleeves were ripped off and she had a camo cowboy hat. Greatest thing I've ever seen.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
Everyone says I win the strip club
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Randomize
