Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
Please sleep at your girlfriend's tonight
Why?
'Cause I wanna jack off tonight.. And you being in the room makes things awkward
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
Randomize
