Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
Randomize
