We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
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