I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
What happened to fro yo and sex?
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
Dude, seriously, fucking stop introducing me as "Thomas, with the dick piercing." you are the worst wingman ever.
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
I was so high I forgot how to swallow food, and I just kept thinking "thank god its just mashed potatoes, they'll go down eventually"
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize
