just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
Randomize
