so that wasnt chicken after all
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
It's a good thing my liver is flexible because a lesser man would be dead
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
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