put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
These tits shall not be calmed
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
