Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
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