we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
Randomize
