i would punch a child for taco bell
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
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