So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
I just found puke in my bra..
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
Randomize
