yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
How naked do you want me to be?
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize
