My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
Barsexuality is the new black.
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
Randomize
