writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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