WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Randomize