My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
I am midnight drunk by noon
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Randomize
