If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
Randomize
