Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
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